A penny for your thoughts

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Friday, March 27, 2009

Lord, calm my anxious thoughts.

Lately I have been so worried about everything in my life. I find myself wishing so much for a simpler time. When I think of a simpler time I think of summer. But even summer is not so simple anymore. Nothing is.

I don't think anyone even reads this anymore. Maybe thats ok. I don't really write for anyone's benefit but my own. I enjoy writing down my thoughts. I think thats mostly what blogging is about anyway.

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Psalm 139:23

I am such a fool sometimes. I worry about my school work, my relationships, the future, money, running, and all kinds of other things. It really all comes down to whether or not I trust that God will take care of me. To be honest, sometimes I doubt that he really has my life in control. It definitely doesn't feel that way sometimes. I'm tired of all the fancy terms people use to define their version of The Gospel.

Sometimes I just feel like I need to be held. Like I need to tell someone all of my anxious thoughts, and have them care, and then know that no matter what I'll be taken care of. To know that I am under grace, and sweet mercy. And then to have rest.

I know there is a lot of fancy theology missing from that. But most of the time, thats the gospel I need. Just loving God, and loving eachother.

Lord let it be...

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